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The ordinary, not the extraordinary

First, before I launch into this post, let’s set the record straight. Bennett is no longer this…

Growth Spurt is killing me...Eat, stay awake, fuss....rinse and repeat.  Give me my angel baby back!!!

Although that only lasted about five days. He is most definitely this….

Hanging out in Chloe's room

Can you believe how much chub he has put on. Our little Alfred Hitchcock…but not a weirdo like him. The chins…they are out of control!

Okay, this is one of those posts…lots of pictures, lots of emoting. Choose now to scroll through and see pictures or commit to reading. The choice is yours.

Hanging out in Chloe's room

I have had some great friends visit over the last few weeks including my very best friend Dikola. She left a couple days ago and before she left we had our usual time of prayer together. I think we could easily pray for an hour straight. She is my spiritual soul sister. One of the questions she asked me is how is my time with Jesus. Well, now…good question. The key word “TIME” is relative. Those of you with multiple kids, especially really young dependent kids know that your day is filled with the relatively simple and redundant tasks of feeding, changing, playing, comforting, picking up endless numbers of toys and sometimes actually taking a shower and getting ready. My life is no exception except at night I have the distinct pleasure of editing a butt load of photos, balancing our finances for our business and home, and making calls. I know, cue tiny violins. I can’t really complain because this is how I can stay home and be with my children and not have to work a 9-5 job. So I am very thankful for God’s provisions through Kellan.

Hanging out in Chloe's room

Anyhoo, so my answer to her was… although times with the Lord are scattered at best, I have found that I am in a constant place of worship and thankfulness because of my kids. It may sound weird or cliche to some, but to others it will strike a cord.

Hanging out in Chloe's room

It is hard to explain in words the depth of love I can feel when chubby little arms fling around my neck and a raspy little voice says, “Meh Ma” Nothing extraordinary about that moment, it is just a moment, a moment where this little girl that lived inside of me, came out and has become her own person decided that she wanted to give me a hug. God did that….for ME…so that I can see his goodness and love. He did that for ME. Ordinary? No.

Hanging out in Chloe's room

I realize that we tend to tag our days as “good” or “bad”.
“Man those kid were hellions today. Didn’t listen to a thing, didn’t take good naps, threw a pitch fit in public….BAD DAY!” Is it though? Is the WHOLE day bad? Is it really based on behavior? Now I admit the day is definitely peppered with good moments and bad moments but I have realized lately when I turn off the TV, put down the computer, crawl onto the floor and I play with Chloe that I am speechless at who she is and who she is becoming.

Hanging out in Chloe's room

Little hands that were once clenched little fists that she didn’t even know were attached to her body, now manipulate puzzle pieces. Dexterity and spacial skills growing by the day. She looks up at me excitedly, proud of herself and makes an elephant noise for emphasis.

Hanging out in Chloe's room

What will these hands do in 10 or 20 years? Cure cancer, paint a masterpiece, dunk a basketball? What would thrill me more is if they would hold a Bible, raise in worship, clasp together in prayer, feed the poor, clothe the needy. That her hands would serve.

Hanging out in Chloe's room

Now that is just me thinking about her hands. Can you imagine what I thank God for when I see her kiss her brother, walk over and share a toy, clap her hands when we sing praise songs at night, smile at a stranger, wave hi to a neighbor. Little moments of ordinary that are extraordinary to me.

Hanging out in Chloe's room

Sometimes I think about how and when you start to love someone. It think back to Ryan and I. Because we were friends for years long before there was romance, I remember being impressed with ordinary acts of kindness that Ryan would do for others. Driving people home, buying meals for people that didn’t have money, taking the time to talk to people that others would easily pass over, never ever ever being late for work, he is always polite, considerate, ethical, and just plain nice. Let me tell you, he was 110% different from the guys I was dating. The love I felt for him was a gradual build. He didn’t climb Mount Everestt or make the baseball hall of fame. He just wowed me with the ordinary. When we have rough seasons in our marriage, I dwell on these truths about him because they are who he is at the core of things and they trump any crappy bump in the road of life we may be working through.

Hanging out in Chloe's room

Not to beat a dead horse, you all are smart enough to know where I am going with this. Can I be honest? I mean it is my blog. I find most mommy blogs boring. GASP….but I do. Unless you are related to my kids….nobody wants to read about the little milestones, what they are eating, how they are pooping and sleeping. Have I written about these things…absolutely (my parents don’t live here…and they do care about these things.) I guess I find them boring when that is all that can be talked about. Were you not your own person with your own interests just a few years ago before you had kids. Is there not more about your life and kids, richer, deeper things you can share. Can you not laugh more and poke fun at the silly things that happen during the day?

Hanging out in Chloe's room

Can I recommend something? Journal to your children. Even if they are 7 years old, it is never too late. I only write in Chloe and Bennett’s every few months. I just tell them what they are doing, learning, and accomplishing. I talk to them about how I feel about them, what I am praying for, how much I love them and what I am learning as their mom.

Hanging out in Chloe's room

My mom wrote a few letters while she was pregnant and they are a treasure to me. To know what she was thinking, feeling, and dreaming about with me in the womb. I wish she had written more.

Hanging out in Chloe's room

My last thing is to focus on the ordinary with your children but pray for the extraordinary. I am going to share one snippit of an entry in Bennett’s journal. This was the first time I wrote to him after I found out we were pregnant. I didn’t know if he was a boy or girl and frankly I was still in shock I was pregnant again. I opened up his journal and asked God to reveal to me the things I should pray for this specific child. This is what he showed me.

Hanging out in Chloe's room

October 25, 2007

I pray you are humble, putting others first, giving God glory for any and all accomplishments

I pray you are not easily offended or angered but quick to listen and quick to forgive

I pray you have a sweet spirit, you laugh easy, speak with grace, not judgmental

I pray you have a humanitarians heart. That you see the world and your potential to help those less fortunate and you would go wherever God asks

I pray you have a great sense of humor, you look at the lighter side of life

I pray that you would have a strong sense of family. That you would love your sister as one of your best friends. That you would trust daddy and me and that we would give you the space and freedom you need to grow into your own person, but the love you need to always come home.

Lastly, and most importantly, I pray you would love the Lord God with all of your heart, mind, soul and strength and recklessly follow his leading.

So those are my specifics for Bennett. I hope that encourages you and gives you ideas of how you can pray into your children’s character. To see them as future adults and not just praying into the age they currently are. I don’t know one person who doesn’t pray for a baby that is a good eater and great sleeper…kinda a gimme…so think beyond that.

One more thing to confirm God’s blessing on an act like this. One of the things God laid on my heart was to pray that Bennett would be willing to go and serve wherever. This, again, was before we knew what gender he was or even had a name picked. Guess what his name means.

Bennett Wade…..”Blessing, To go” ….coincidence? I think not! I had no idea what his name meant when we picked it, just wanted a good family name. But God did. I love that his name confirms my prayers for his character.

Let’s Dish-Part II

Oh my oh my. It seems as my predictions of Jesse and Jeremy are only 50% right. Sounds about right for my predictions! Chloe is definitely a girl and Bennett is definitely a boy…but I called it the opposite!

Side note…..the brown dress from last post….a steal of a deal. Burlington Coat Factory $7.99. It is super cute and comfy.

Where to begin? Kindly click the survey so I may know your predictions.

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Who will Deanna pick?

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Jeremy Fantasy Date:

Cold feet, afraid, can’t let his hair down and heart open. Yeah, well, sorry Charlie. Not the time to clam up. It was so awkward at their dinner I was swallowing golf balls for him. Even though I thought she would stick with him, it was so clear after the other two dates that she is MUCH better suited for the other guys. He is such a robot that I can’t warm up to him. I did feel bad for him on the “After the Rose” episode. Those guys are ruthless about him. Can I just be superficial for a moment…of course I can :-) Those eyebrows distract me so much I can hardly pay attention to words leaving his lips. Like two caterpillars died on his face. Poor caterpillars.

So long….farewell….robot….have a good “perfect” life in Dallas. Thank you Coral for the 411 ahead of time. A reader emailed me that her friend waited on him in a restaurant a few weeks ago and he was with a girl he kept calling “babe” and talking about he and Twilley (a.k.a. Captain Dillhole) were partying it up the week before. She was pretty certain Jeremy had gotten the boot, but you never know what their contract says about playing it off until America finds out. Juicy little tid bit, no?

Jason Fantasy Date:

Okay, I admit it he has really really won me over. Much less vanilla, more vanilla with caramel syrup on top. He is still made of pure sugar, but he has a great boyish charm and energy about him. He was super easy going and so sweet on her. I thought they had a great chemistry together. I still want the 411 on the ex-wife and custody situation. Not sure if he has Ty all the time, 2 weekends a month, full custody. Is the mom still involved in Ty’s life. These are VERY important factors for the ole D-Mister to consider when choosing Jason.

I give him a 50/50 chance….get it….

Jesse Fantasy Date:

Sorry, still my number one pick. How fun and cute are they? I loved watching their date and Jesse is definitely getting better looking as the episodes wear on. He isn’t dressing as freaky deaky either. He found the happy medium between bizarre and funky. I was slightly concerned with his answer to “what are you going to do after snowboarding.” I know he gave some ideas of careers he thought would be “fun” and all he wanted to do is “be happy”. Well hop on your unicorn and ride a rainbow. A girl needs some stability not ideas of fun jobs. Might be a strike against him. Still..STILL…I do love me some Jesse. He makes me laugh. Sounds like someone else I know.

Rose Ceremony:

SHOCKER…not really, but kinda. Felt bad for Jeremy. Really, all of them, at this point, has to be tough on the heart. But still…he couldn’t squeeze out one teeny tiny tear, nothing. The dramatic get out of the limo was all he had to show for his broken heart? Moving on…

After the rose Ceremony:

Hot Graham + No ability to share feelings = Hot Mess

Man did he act like a douche. (note to self, he does not look as good with the scruff gone) Deanna handled herself well considering a few little attacks she endured. Dude in the back…Ryan I believe….did he have an ax to grind or what? Get over it, your five minutes are over. Nobody wanted to hear your two cents. I would have rather heard from Fred. Twilley, I am pretty sure was dropped on his head as a baby. I can not stand watching him talk. He is NOT funny and his head bobs everywhere which is very distracting.

I did feel bad for Jeremy when she said announce she was happy and engaged and they pan to him while everyone is clapping which he politely joins in. Twist the knife a bit. Poor guy, even robots have hearts.

That is my two cents, cash it in if you like or put it towards retirement.

So who is dying for next week? I do think she will pick Jason for his stability, but my heart belongs to Jesse, I mean Ryan. WINK!

Here is a little picture for you non-Bachelorette watchers.

Two are better than one. At least that is Bennett’s motto when it comes to chins. I hopped in the crib with Chloe and Bennett and asked her to hold him. This was as close as she was going to get to him. The expression says it all. This angle on Bennett makes him look like Alfred Hitchcock.

Chloe and "Alfred Hitchcock" Bennett.  Can you feel the love?

Geez Louise

What is with the flack for not putting up photos or bragging on my kids. I try not to be THAT mom or THAT blog even though I do slip up.

Because we are in wedding season and my arse is on the couch at night editing a BAH-GILLION wedding, bridal and engagement photos, I feel negative 10 desire to take more pictures of my kids and edit those. So…my wonderful friend Heather, who came to visit us from the great North took some pictures and I will shamelessly rip them off so that you can get your eye candy of the Benster and me. Nope, don’t call him that.

How cute is he? No seriously, on a scale of 1 to 10 rate my child!!!! Kidding. He is a WINNER in my eyes. Can you believe what a moose he is and SOOO strong. He sits with his head held high with no help. Did I birth a three month old? I love him so much, he is such a flirt with me I could eat him up! He talks so much and LOUD! Chloe is and has always been really quiet…details kinda girl. Bennett may be my little chatterbox.

Heather's pictures from her trip to VA that I shamelessly stole- Holding my devilishly handsome boy

Heather is 23 weeks prego with her first….YEAH!

Heather's pictures from her trip to VA that I shamelessly stole-Heather holding my Bennett

I am trying out for the Hunchback of Notre Dame. I think I will get the part if I am lucky! The hamhock arms are for good measure.

Heather's pictures from her trip to VA that I shamelessly stole- I am trying out for the hunchback of notre dame.

Drinking the nectar of the gods….Chickfila milkshakes!

Heather's pictures from her trip to VA that I shamelessly stole- drinking the nectar of the gods..Chickfila milkshakes

AT Joy’s b-day party. My jublees made a nice appearance, no?

Heather's pictures from her trip to VA that I shamelessly stole- heather, me and joy at joy's b-day

There you have it. Pictures of my family not by me!! Thanks Heather. We miss you already. Happy weekend.

Monday…come on ladies…we will dish part II on the Bachelorette.

Let’s dish…

I don’t want to hear it, Not One Single Word about my enormous gaps in blogging. It isn’t my desire to leave you hanging from my ultra exciting life….I just can’t, in good conscience, put the time in. If I were Dooce and got paid out the butt to blog…well…then I would find the time. But seeing as all of you read and none of you pay me…WELL…you get what you get! Cash and checks are welcome though.

So this is a quick one. I need to hear some opinions on The Bachlorette!!!! You heard me. Superficial TV at it’s finest. Anyone in blogland watching this season? Oh my word, I am so stinking hooked. Usually I watch because Monday nights blow for TV and it is so junior high…like watching a trainwreck of bad decisions…BUT….this time I am so feeling Deanna’s sincerity.

I totally did NOT like her when she was one of the ladies on The Bachelor. Talk about a “know it all”. I have since warmed up to her and feel like she is one of the only ones to really care about the guys’ feelings and not lead anyone on. She doesn’t take any B.S. which I really appreciate. She is really mature for 26.

So yesterday morning at 6:25 am as I am breastfeeding Bennett in bed I caught up on my episode on ABC.com…..thank you ABC. Not a bad way to spend the morning hour if you have to get up so early. Ryan is working a new summer shift for the school system…a four-day work week. So he gets Monday’s off all summer but has to pull 10 hour days Tues-Friday. He goes in from 6:00-4:30. So basically I get to hear him clanking around in the five o’clock hour then the kids seem to know that they should wake up and keep mommy up. So not cool. I want to drop kick Chloe because she used to sleep till 7:00 and now for the last few months she thinks 5:45-6:30 is much better! We have upped her bedtime an hour and it has made NO difference. W T H?????? Bennett is still a dream and has been sleeping 7-9 hours straight at night. YUPPPPPPPERS, at 7 weeks he is sleeping like a champ. Thank you Jesus.

Anyway….

So….Jessie. Super dooper love him with a cherry on top. I think it was because my brother is into extreme sports so I grew up around those types of guys that I have a soft spot for ones who actually pull their crap together but are still a total goof ball. I do not condone his style of dress. White suit…come on Jessie…this is not Miami Vice. But I will forgive his clothing faux pas because he is such a gentlemen, hilarious, and sweet. I love his OCD tendencies…labels on his kitchen cabinets…WHOA! Even though he is my favorite I don’t think she will pick him in the end. My guess is he and Jeremy will be the last two.

Jeremy….I fight the fact that I love Jessie so much that I think Jeremy is more of a dill than he probably really is. He just isn’t my type. He is a little too reserved and square for me, but I can’t deny they do share a bond with both losing parents. I think he may be the front runner but she has surprised me many times throughout the show…so who knows.

Jason. He is very very very sweet. I don’t see him with Deanna in the end, even though I think he is a class act and a very loving dad. I don’t have much to say about Jason. He is vanilla, not really memorable, but when someone brings up his name you think… He is nice.

Graham….day late, dollar short buddy. Yeah you are hot, but you are a dill times ten. He did actually shed real tears in the end. That was the most vulnerable he had been the whole time. I think she was wise to let him go even though she was most attracted to him. Been there, done that, not worth it. I think she would have always been working 200% in that relationship to get him to communicate and not be so withdrawn. Mysterious is fun at first, but not husband material.

Can. Not. Wait for next Monday for the tell-all episode and fantasy dates.

Is it sad how giddy I get when I wake up on Mondays knowing that The Bachelorette is on that night? Yeah, pretty pitiful, don’t judge….we all have TV shows that are guilty pleasures. So if you can’t wager in on The Bachelorette, tell me your guilty pleasure show. Ryan and I straight up love America’s Next Dance Crew…..we can watch ENDLESS hours of home renovation shows…ENDLESS hours and Candace got me hooked on “What I like about you”….Amanda Bynes and Jenny Garth…I know, I know, I know…but it really is funny in that corny predictable way. (this show was watched pre-Bennett…I can’t watch any adult tv during the day.)

So go on…fess up….confession is good for the soul. What’s your guilty TV pleasure?

Another round bartender

For those of you who haven’t been scowering my Flickr account…then these pictures will seem new to you. I usually upload my pictures and then quickly write a post…however, I went to Richmond to visit my parents an hour after uploading and here it is two days later and I am just getting around to writing a post. Oh well….

For the last few years on my birthday I have gotten my girlie friends together to go out to my favorite restaurant for dessert and wine. I love getting dressed up and getting as many of my favorite gals around me as possible. No formal parties or presents needed, I am getting too old for parties, I would much rather have a total girls night.

This year I thought it would be fun to have a shin dig at my new place. The house we bought is an old 1920’s Craftsman style home. We have a really huge porch that is just begging to be broken in. So I sent out the invites for the girls to don their best cleavage baring dresses and come on over for lots of this.

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0749

My very talented friend, Candace, (check out her decorating skillz….) came over to help me decorate and make her famous cupcakes. Everyone brought over a bottle of wine and an appetizer or dessert. There were some GOOD EATS!!! Can I just mention that 75% of my guests were pregnant or breastfeeding. Let’s just say Bennett got formula that night, mama was going to have some wine…period!

The color scheme was teal, red and pink. Check it out.

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0711

OOOHHHHH Cupcakes!!!!

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0714

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0718

Panera bread with olive oil and balsamic vinegar. YUMMMMMMY in my tummy.

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0720

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0715

Who wants to help me clean up?

Candace volunteering to do all the clean up...what a pal

What a trooper Can, thanks for all your help. Wait..is that you stuffing your face?

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0729

Unfortunately I did not get pictures of everyone…sorry! I don’t even get a picture of myself…party foul! To my bff ladies far and wide that live too far to be here…man did we miss you.

Here are some of my ladies gabbing it up about world changing topics such as…comfortable bras, good sales happening, what fatty mcfat snack they were going to devour next…

I have to tell you about my favorite thing that happened all night. I told the girls on the invitation that there would be no talk of babies or children…this was adult time. However, HOWEVER….I heard over and over “We are not suppose to talk about this…BUT….I just have to say REAL QUICK…that my baby……blahdity blah blah blah.” Way to go girls. You’re all oaks.

Honorary host..Candace. She took the cleavage thing literally! I almost censored her. She is 9 months preggo. Way to bring the twins Can. Her tan makes me seethe with jealousy.

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0734

Amanda…surprisingly…talking! Amanda is the kind of friend who can talk to anyone about anything, seriously…try her…throw out any topic. You just want to take a breath for her once an awhile.

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0736

Jackie boozing it up…kidding…she was a good girl.

Jackie thinking about what fatty McFat snack she wants to eat next

Steph showing off her sewing skills. She made her dress. How awesome is that?

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0751

Erin, my tune master. She makes the greatest CD mixes. I am sure back in the day she was the kid sitting next to her hot pink Casio tape deck taping off the radio.

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0747

My favorite cleavage bearing friend, G-Love. Gretchen finds it completely hilarious (I mean annoying) that every year I call her out for not baring cleavage. She could put us all to shame. I love to beat a dead horse,(shocker) so of course I make a big deal about it EVERY year. What G, is this 10 years in a row you have covered your jublees up?

My fav...G-Love

My former roomie and dear sweet friend, Janelle.

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0743

Katie, mother of three and one on the way. She is so adorable.

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Charity….who can confidently quote from Elf that “smiling is her favorite”.

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Adria, my pregnancy buddy. Her son was born 6 days before Bennett.

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Oh wait…there is my little noggin. I am in the middle with the nubby ponytail. I really was there. I am saying goodbye to the last of the party goers!

Kelly's 32nd b-dau Shindig_0709

Thank you ladies. I had a great night! We need to do this MORE often.