My chitlins archive at Filtering Life

Deanna and Jesse sitting in a tree, K-I-SS-I-N-G. First comes friendship, then comes kissing, THEN comes proposal. Wow. What an ending. They totally edited the first hour to look like Jesse was a total numnut at Deanna’s parents house. The dad would ask a question and Jesse would sit there with a nervous face and then they would cut to the next scene. Ummm…hello…can we at least hear how he answered. We got the point that he was nervous and checked his personality at the door…but come on, give us a fair shot at how the day really went.

The Jeremy segment…kinda awkward, kinda sad, kinda…well…awkward. Especially his crouched down move after he left the house. You think he is bawling his eyes out but he is just crouched down acting like he is crying. It’s a little word I like to call “CLOSURE”. So did the “Men tell all” episode happen before or after he talked to her again in Malibu? Because he asked her the same questions there as he did in that episode. Weird, don’t get that whole segment. Buzz kill during three terrific hours.

So yeah, not much to say but that I am genuinely happy for them, I feel terrible for Jason. That was very shocking and he is top shelf sweetness, so a broken heart is so terrible to hand anyone. Who knows, maybe he will be the next Bachelor. The show has totally redeemed itself. It was really really decent this season. (can’t say as much for Matt/Shane…or I mean Matt and Monkey…just can’t get into them)

Moving on.

Thank you for all your wonderful comments from my last post. I need to respond to a few of you, especially those that really opened up or commented for the first time. Thank you.

I wanted to give you a little eye candy on this fine Tuesday afternoon. On Sunday morning while Ryan and I were getting our coffee I came back into the living room to a couch full of the most scrumptious little people in the world. You can see everyone is in the early…EARLY…morning stupor. My heart smiled. This is my FAMILY. It never gets old and it never stops amazing me. Three years ago I lived in an apartment with a roommate. Now I own a home, married with two children. BLINK!

Sorry for the grainy shots. It was dark in there and I didn’t want to bother with the external flash.

Do you love the new pillows I FINALLY finished. My poor sewing machine is lonely in the closet. Such a pain to set it up and tear it down between naps. This is the fabulous IKEA material I got many moons ago for the dining room curtains and to recover a bench. LOVE IT. Totally ties the two rooms together.

Hey sweet cheeks, going my way?

Chloe looks like a little elf when her ears poke through her hair. I wonder if smiling is her favorite? Apparently, not that morning.

This dollar store foam puzzle has become her obsession. To the point I am ready to hide it. I can’t decide if it is the best dollar I ever spent or the worst because she pesters you all day to put it together and take it apart a million times. She is finally starting to talk this last week (outside of her 10 words she has said for months). The puzzle has Disney princesses on it. She calls Cinderella “rella” and if you can imagine a bunch of marbles in her mouth, then you would clearly hear the word Air-el for Aerial. I wouldn’t have gotten it if her chubby little pointer finger wasn’t violently poking the Aerial piece. Now I get how parents can understand their kids but nobody else can.

Hey Bennett, did you eat a doorknob for breakfast. It is official. This is the worst possible angle to photograph your children at. His zipper is all jacked up and it looks like an alien is popping out of his chest to eat all his chins. At least that is the image that pops into my mind, you?

Fourth of July was pretty low key. We are in the process of painting our house on the outside. I know..I just love to sit around and do nothing! So we have converted the hideous early 90’s hunter green trim and cedar shakes into a wonderful sorta mushroom brown. We bought shutters and painted and hung those. SOOOOOO much better. My little home is turning into the cottage I have in my head. In another year it should be just about magazine worthy. I love my house, I LOVE IT!

We worked all afternoon on the porch so we had some neighbors over to grill out and watch the fireworks from our front porch. Who knew when we bought it that we could see the city’s fireworks off our porch….five dollar view.

UNFORTUNATELY…it was a very hazy day so they shot them really low in the sky so we barely saw an edge of a firework. How sad.
As boys would be boys, our neighbor brought over a stash of fireworks to light on our lawn. We were THOSE neighbors. Instantly, Ryan and the other guys turned into 12 year olds shooting them at each other and having contests. I don’t get it.

FIRE + STUPIDITY = BURNS

Nobody got seriously hurt but there was some contact with flesh and fire.

I had to lay down the mommy hammer once they started shooting the firecrackers into the sewer drains so it sounded like a cannon was going off. Do you think the guys would have been the ones comforting the waking crying children?

Lastly in this fascinating post of randomness. We are apparently Nest Farmers. I mean our ferns seem to attract every egg laying bird in the county. We pull one of these nests out of our ferns every 1-2 weeks. Anyone interested in purchasing a real live nest?

That’s all I got.

First, before I launch into this post, let’s set the record straight. Bennett is no longer this…

Although that only lasted about five days. He is most definitely this….

Can you believe how much chub he has put on. Our little Alfred Hitchcock…but not a weirdo like him. The chins…they are out of control!

Okay, this is one of those posts…lots of pictures, lots of emoting. Choose now to scroll through and see pictures or commit to reading. The choice is yours.

I have had some great friends visit over the last few weeks including my very best friend Dikola. She left a couple days ago and before she left we had our usual time of prayer together. I think we could easily pray for an hour straight. She is my spiritual soul sister. One of the questions she asked me is how is my time with Jesus. Well, now…good question. The key word “TIME” is relative. Those of you with multiple kids, especially really young dependent kids know that your day is filled with the relatively simple and redundant tasks of feeding, changing, playing, comforting, picking up endless numbers of toys and sometimes actually taking a shower and getting ready. My life is no exception except at night I have the distinct pleasure of editing a butt load of photos, balancing our finances for our business and home, and making calls. I know, cue tiny violins. I can’t really complain because this is how I can stay home and be with my children and not have to work a 9-5 job. So I am very thankful for God’s provisions through Kellan.

Anyhoo, so my answer to her was… although times with the Lord are scattered at best, I have found that I am in a constant place of worship and thankfulness because of my kids. It may sound weird or cliche to some, but to others it will strike a cord.

It is hard to explain in words the depth of love I can feel when chubby little arms fling around my neck and a raspy little voice says, “Meh Ma” Nothing extraordinary about that moment, it is just a moment, a moment where this little girl that lived inside of me, came out and has become her own person decided that she wanted to give me a hug. God did that….for ME…so that I can see his goodness and love. He did that for ME. Ordinary? No.

I realize that we tend to tag our days as “good” or “bad”.
“Man those kid were hellions today. Didn’t listen to a thing, didn’t take good naps, threw a pitch fit in public….BAD DAY!” Is it though? Is the WHOLE day bad? Is it really based on behavior? Now I admit the day is definitely peppered with good moments and bad moments but I have realized lately when I turn off the TV, put down the computer, crawl onto the floor and I play with Chloe that I am speechless at who she is and who she is becoming.

Little hands that were once clenched little fists that she didn’t even know were attached to her body, now manipulate puzzle pieces. Dexterity and spacial skills growing by the day. She looks up at me excitedly, proud of herself and makes an elephant noise for emphasis.

What will these hands do in 10 or 20 years? Cure cancer, paint a masterpiece, dunk a basketball? What would thrill me more is if they would hold a Bible, raise in worship, clasp together in prayer, feed the poor, clothe the needy. That her hands would serve.

Now that is just me thinking about her hands. Can you imagine what I thank God for when I see her kiss her brother, walk over and share a toy, clap her hands when we sing praise songs at night, smile at a stranger, wave hi to a neighbor. Little moments of ordinary that are extraordinary to me.

Sometimes I think about how and when you start to love someone. It think back to Ryan and I. Because we were friends for years long before there was romance, I remember being impressed with ordinary acts of kindness that Ryan would do for others. Driving people home, buying meals for people that didn’t have money, taking the time to talk to people that others would easily pass over, never ever ever being late for work, he is always polite, considerate, ethical, and just plain nice. Let me tell you, he was 110% different from the guys I was dating. The love I felt for him was a gradual build. He didn’t climb Mount Everestt or make the baseball hall of fame. He just wowed me with the ordinary. When we have rough seasons in our marriage, I dwell on these truths about him because they are who he is at the core of things and they trump any crappy bump in the road of life we may be working through.

Not to beat a dead horse, you all are smart enough to know where I am going with this. Can I be honest? I mean it is my blog. I find most mommy blogs boring. GASP….but I do. Unless you are related to my kids….nobody wants to read about the little milestones, what they are eating, how they are pooping and sleeping. Have I written about these things…absolutely (my parents don’t live here…and they do care about these things.) I guess I find them boring when that is all that can be talked about. Were you not your own person with your own interests just a few years ago before you had kids. Is there not more about your life and kids, richer, deeper things you can share. Can you not laugh more and poke fun at the silly things that happen during the day?

Can I recommend something? Journal to your children. Even if they are 7 years old, it is never too late. I only write in Chloe and Bennett’s every few months. I just tell them what they are doing, learning, and accomplishing. I talk to them about how I feel about them, what I am praying for, how much I love them and what I am learning as their mom.

My mom wrote a few letters while she was pregnant and they are a treasure to me. To know what she was thinking, feeling, and dreaming about with me in the womb. I wish she had written more.

My last thing is to focus on the ordinary with your children but pray for the extraordinary. I am going to share one snippit of an entry in Bennett’s journal. This was the first time I wrote to him after I found out we were pregnant. I didn’t know if he was a boy or girl and frankly I was still in shock I was pregnant again. I opened up his journal and asked God to reveal to me the things I should pray for this specific child. This is what he showed me.

October 25, 2007

I pray you are humble, putting others first, giving God glory for any and all accomplishments

I pray you are not easily offended or angered but quick to listen and quick to forgive

I pray you have a sweet spirit, you laugh easy, speak with grace, not judgmental

I pray you have a humanitarians heart. That you see the world and your potential to help those less fortunate and you would go wherever God asks

I pray you have a great sense of humor, you look at the lighter side of life

I pray that you would have a strong sense of family. That you would love your sister as one of your best friends. That you would trust daddy and me and that we would give you the space and freedom you need to grow into your own person, but the love you need to always come home.

Lastly, and most importantly, I pray you would love the Lord God with all of your heart, mind, soul and strength and recklessly follow his leading.

So those are my specifics for Bennett. I hope that encourages you and gives you ideas of how you can pray into your children’s character. To see them as future adults and not just praying into the age they currently are. I don’t know one person who doesn’t pray for a baby that is a good eater and great sleeper…kinda a gimme…so think beyond that.

One more thing to confirm God’s blessing on an act like this. One of the things God laid on my heart was to pray that Bennett would be willing to go and serve wherever. This, again, was before we knew what gender he was or even had a name picked. Guess what his name means.

Bennett Wade…..”Blessing, To go” ….coincidence? I think not! I had no idea what his name meant when we picked it, just wanted a good family name. But God did. I love that his name confirms my prayers for his character.