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The Chloster

Published by Kelly July 15th, 2008 in Chloe Grace and Photoganza. 20 Comments

When is that moment that you pass from infancy to toddlerhood to childhood. There are moments I look at Chloe and I don’t know when it happened, but it did. Just a mere 20 months ago she was born in to the world.

Last week as we were hanging out on the porch I saw a little girl. One mindlessly eating pretzels, chatting away, getting on and off of a chair, nothing really special…but she looked so old! It is exciting and sad all at once.

With her growing independence I get more thrilled that we can communicate more, but with independence comes a stubborn will. She definitely has some donkey in her! Like mother like daughter.

I love her neck…it is so pretty.

She will kill me for this one day. Her little knock knees….like mother like daughter!

And so time goes marching on and so my little girl grows, learns and expands her world. I am so thankful to have a daughter. One that is so sweet, funny, sensitive, and intelligent. She teaches me patience, joy, love and how to laugh from my belly.

I realize the last few posts have been a bit melancholy. I don’t apologize for such things. So many things the Lord is teaching me and a deep appreciation for those around me and my family has swept over me. Ramey’s death has been a wake up call on many levels and I am so thankful.

The ordinary, not the extraordinary

Published by Kelly July 3rd, 2008 in Bennett Wade, Chloe Grace, My chitlins and Straight from the heart. 32 Comments

First, before I launch into this post, let’s set the record straight. Bennett is no longer this…

Although that only lasted about five days. He is most definitely this….

Can you believe how much chub he has put on. Our little Alfred Hitchcock…but not a weirdo like him. The chins…they are out of control!

Okay, this is one of those posts…lots of pictures, lots of emoting. Choose now to scroll through and see pictures or commit to reading. The choice is yours.

I have had some great friends visit over the last few weeks including my very best friend Dikola. She left a couple days ago and before she left we had our usual time of prayer together. I think we could easily pray for an hour straight. She is my spiritual soul sister. One of the questions she asked me is how is my time with Jesus. Well, now…good question. The key word “TIME” is relative. Those of you with multiple kids, especially really young dependent kids know that your day is filled with the relatively simple and redundant tasks of feeding, changing, playing, comforting, picking up endless numbers of toys and sometimes actually taking a shower and getting ready. My life is no exception except at night I have the distinct pleasure of editing a butt load of photos, balancing our finances for our business and home, and making calls. I know, cue tiny violins. I can’t really complain because this is how I can stay home and be with my children and not have to work a 9-5 job. So I am very thankful for God’s provisions through Kellan.

Anyhoo, so my answer to her was… although times with the Lord are scattered at best, I have found that I am in a constant place of worship and thankfulness because of my kids. It may sound weird or cliche to some, but to others it will strike a cord.

It is hard to explain in words the depth of love I can feel when chubby little arms fling around my neck and a raspy little voice says, “Meh Ma” Nothing extraordinary about that moment, it is just a moment, a moment where this little girl that lived inside of me, came out and has become her own person decided that she wanted to give me a hug. God did that….for ME…so that I can see his goodness and love. He did that for ME. Ordinary? No.

I realize that we tend to tag our days as “good” or “bad”.
“Man those kid were hellions today. Didn’t listen to a thing, didn’t take good naps, threw a pitch fit in public….BAD DAY!” Is it though? Is the WHOLE day bad? Is it really based on behavior? Now I admit the day is definitely peppered with good moments and bad moments but I have realized lately when I turn off the TV, put down the computer, crawl onto the floor and I play with Chloe that I am speechless at who she is and who she is becoming.

Little hands that were once clenched little fists that she didn’t even know were attached to her body, now manipulate puzzle pieces. Dexterity and spacial skills growing by the day. She looks up at me excitedly, proud of herself and makes an elephant noise for emphasis.

What will these hands do in 10 or 20 years? Cure cancer, paint a masterpiece, dunk a basketball? What would thrill me more is if they would hold a Bible, raise in worship, clasp together in prayer, feed the poor, clothe the needy. That her hands would serve.

Now that is just me thinking about her hands. Can you imagine what I thank God for when I see her kiss her brother, walk over and share a toy, clap her hands when we sing praise songs at night, smile at a stranger, wave hi to a neighbor. Little moments of ordinary that are extraordinary to me.

Sometimes I think about how and when you start to love someone. It think back to Ryan and I. Because we were friends for years long before there was romance, I remember being impressed with ordinary acts of kindness that Ryan would do for others. Driving people home, buying meals for people that didn’t have money, taking the time to talk to people that others would easily pass over, never ever ever being late for work, he is always polite, considerate, ethical, and just plain nice. Let me tell you, he was 110% different from the guys I was dating. The love I felt for him was a gradual build. He didn’t climb Mount Everestt or make the baseball hall of fame. He just wowed me with the ordinary. When we have rough seasons in our marriage, I dwell on these truths about him because they are who he is at the core of things and they trump any crappy bump in the road of life we may be working through.

Not to beat a dead horse, you all are smart enough to know where I am going with this. Can I be honest? I mean it is my blog. I find most mommy blogs boring. GASP….but I do. Unless you are related to my kids….nobody wants to read about the little milestones, what they are eating, how they are pooping and sleeping. Have I written about these things…absolutely (my parents don’t live here…and they do care about these things.) I guess I find them boring when that is all that can be talked about. Were you not your own person with your own interests just a few years ago before you had kids. Is there not more about your life and kids, richer, deeper things you can share. Can you not laugh more and poke fun at the silly things that happen during the day?

Can I recommend something? Journal to your children. Even if they are 7 years old, it is never too late. I only write in Chloe and Bennett’s every few months. I just tell them what they are doing, learning, and accomplishing. I talk to them about how I feel about them, what I am praying for, how much I love them and what I am learning as their mom.

My mom wrote a few letters while she was pregnant and they are a treasure to me. To know what she was thinking, feeling, and dreaming about with me in the womb. I wish she had written more.

My last thing is to focus on the ordinary with your children but pray for the extraordinary. I am going to share one snippit of an entry in Bennett’s journal. This was the first time I wrote to him after I found out we were pregnant. I didn’t know if he was a boy or girl and frankly I was still in shock I was pregnant again. I opened up his journal and asked God to reveal to me the things I should pray for this specific child. This is what he showed me.

October 25, 2007

I pray you are humble, putting others first, giving God glory for any and all accomplishments

I pray you are not easily offended or angered but quick to listen and quick to forgive

I pray you have a sweet spirit, you laugh easy, speak with grace, not judgmental

I pray you have a humanitarians heart. That you see the world and your potential to help those less fortunate and you would go wherever God asks

I pray you have a great sense of humor, you look at the lighter side of life

I pray that you would have a strong sense of family. That you would love your sister as one of your best friends. That you would trust daddy and me and that we would give you the space and freedom you need to grow into your own person, but the love you need to always come home.

Lastly, and most importantly, I pray you would love the Lord God with all of your heart, mind, soul and strength and recklessly follow his leading.

So those are my specifics for Bennett. I hope that encourages you and gives you ideas of how you can pray into your children’s character. To see them as future adults and not just praying into the age they currently are. I don’t know one person who doesn’t pray for a baby that is a good eater and great sleeper…kinda a gimme…so think beyond that.

One more thing to confirm God’s blessing on an act like this. One of the things God laid on my heart was to pray that Bennett would be willing to go and serve wherever. This, again, was before we knew what gender he was or even had a name picked. Guess what his name means.

Bennett Wade…..”Blessing, To go” ….coincidence? I think not! I had no idea what his name meant when we picked it, just wanted a good family name. But God did. I love that his name confirms my prayers for his character.

Dramatic Pause

Published by Kelly May 29th, 2008 in Bennett Wade and Chloe Grace. 22 Comments

I am afraid you are going to have to take the crumbs I throw at you and eat them as a meal because I don’t see me blogging much until things settle down on my end. I am dealing with a serious case of Growth Spurt HELLLLLLLL. My angel baby decided at 3 weeks, 2 days to turn my world upside down for the last three days.

My back is killing me from lugging him in the sling, the swaddle, my arms, my chest, rock, pat, jiggle, do the Hustle…whatever for him to stop fussing. He owes my boobs a serious apology for wanting to eat morning noon and night. Having two is a whole new world to me. I need to rattle our money tree because I want a nanny to help me during the day. Mom…I am hiring…want to apply?

My mom left on Sunday after a month of help. What did I do the second she pulled away? Your dang skippy I bawled my eyeballs out and continued to cry on and off for the next three hours. It was pitiful. It isn’t that I can’t do it. Please don’t leave me a comment saying that…so patronizing. Of course I “can do it”, it has just been wonderful to have basically your best friend staying with you all day giving you wonderful adult conversation and harmoniously taking care of the house and kids with you. We were a well oiled wheel. Like peanut butter and jelly. Although, truth be told, she did way more work than me. Mom I love you so much and miss you. I am counting down the days until you visit again. A thousand thank yous!

You have asked me how Chloe likes her brother. Well I think she thinks he is boring and a bit whiny. I would tend to agree with her on some level, except I find him irresistibly adorable and kissable and that makes up for his lack of ability to run around and play with her. She mostly ignores him but will tolerate us asking her to point out his hair, nose, eyes (which she loves to poke and dies laughing). I have chased her around the house with him in the Superman position, which she finds very amusing. I like to trick her into thinking he is playing with her. At night when we sing and do prayers we put Bennett in her crib with her. She was a little weirded out at first but now thinks it is pretty funny and has held his hand a few times. Melt my heart and put it back in my chest. So I think it is going as well as it can with an 18 month old. I think in about six months when he is sitting up and reacting to her she will love the audience.

Let’s get to what you all come here for…pictures! You won’t be seeing any Bennett pictures. Right now he is laying with a paper bag over his head until his raging case of baby acne and milia clears up. Kidding, but let’s just say I am not anxious to document his skin right now and I haven’t picked up a camera to take his picture in almost two weeks. (slaps hand)
What I will give you is a dose of Chloe Grace. About a week after Bennett was born we decided to take Chloe on a special date. Things had been so weird with me in the hospital and then when I got home here I am with a baby in hand….she needed some one on one time with mommy and daddy.

There is a very cool place around here called, Amazement Square. It is an old warehouse that has been converted into a kids discovery museum. On Wednesday nights it is only $2.00 for adults to go. The bottom two floors are for the wee ones.

Chloe’s head exploded when we walked through the door and she saw there was an area that was set up like a farm. Her favorite type of animals. She was like a pin ball machine bouncing from one thing to another. It was so fun to watch her face. Enjoy some of my favorite moments.

Yes the wall color was that obnoxious. Apparently, toddlers love it.

Putting corn in the stalks hanging from the ceiling.

Whoops…how did that get in here (wink). I recognize that assett!

Carrying her favorite animal….COWS!

Daddy being a trooper crawling through the tunnels with Chloe

This is a gigantic wall of plastic pegs that Chloe could not stop pushing in as fast as she could.

The stairs light up…how freaking cool!!

They had a tactile tub with all these rubber bits and toys hidden inside. Chloe was more about throwing the rubber bits than the toys…but there was no rule about keeping it in the bucket.

Playing with daddy on the athletes foot mats. Can you only imagine what is growing on those things. Ignorance is bliss!

Chloe desperately wanted to take this mushroom stool home with her. Too bad it was bolted to the ground. She was a wee bit frustrated and I think she may have thrown out her back trying to pull with all her might. It was hilarious.

This is for you Sizzle. Remember that creepy glove picture you sent me after my post about the tree man? I found this “puppet” and thought of you right away.

Fun, fun, fun till your daddy takes your T-bird away. Smell you later!

Introducing…..

Published by Kelly April 21st, 2008 in Adventures in Pregnancy, Bennett Wade, Chloe Grace, Confessions and For Kicks and Giggles. 17 Comments

NOBODY!

Yes, I am a big fat jerk! You know that twinge of disappointment you just felt…well multiply it by a million and you will know what I feel every time I have a contraction. WHAAAAAA…..get him out of me! Come on, full moon yesterday, low pressure system, afternoon delight with the hubby, I am sipping red raspberry leaf tea as I type this. Contractions on and off all day and all night…but no…not enough to put me into the hospital. This is torture, I would so rather not have any signs then having TONS of signs but not going anywhere.

So yeah, I didn’t want to leave you hanging…still sitting here swollen and tired but really really excited to meet Bennett. With each passing day I get more and more thrilled at kissing my little boy and less scared about labor and having two wee ones.

I do feel like this weekend was a gift from the Lord. This is our first free weekend, Friday-Sunday since December. We had so much fun as a family and the weather was amazing! We ventured down to the community market to let Chloe explore. She had a ball. She also ate her first homemade mini cinnamon donuts. Guess who kept double fisting them? Mommy’s little girl! If food were alcohol she would drink you under the table in a second!

So I will leave you with some more family moments from the market and going to church yesterday.

oh quick belly shot.

Smelling a flower….kinda demonic looking.

Look how tall she is! We had our 18 month check up today….33 inches! She is over half my height already. I am screwed in my own family.

Ry took some cool water fountain shots.

Donut time. The Kettle Corn man wasn’t there…so this was our consolation prize, homemade donuts….terrible I know!

Waiting for mom and dad for church.

And a HUGE thank you to my sister in law, Meridyth, for her very fun package she sent to Chloe, Bennett and me. Lots and lots of special treats. I am afraid she is not willing to share the giraffe with Bennett, she has already carried it all over the house. Maybe it is time to start working on sharing!

If you haven’t made your height/weight wager…remember to comment on the post below for a chance at a pillow or burp cloths! Be kind to my uterus.

Lay your cards on the table

Published by Kelly April 18th, 2008 in Adventures in Pregnancy, Bennett Wade and Chloe Grace. 49 Comments

Houston, we have liftoff! My cervix was sealed up like a drum last week and after yesterday’s check….50% effaced and 1-2 dilation. So we are progressing and effacement is the biggie, so I am thrilled that all these contractions are getting me somewhere. Of course we know there are only three imminent things that put you into the hospital, so I am just letting things roll and still hoping and praying for today to go into labor. Let’s see, three rounds of diarrhea, nausea and vomiting once today and it is only 1:00….so my body is definitely having fun with me and it better not be a dirty dirty tease.

So it is poll time! That is right kiddies…cast your ballot on the poll, but if you want to win a prize you need to put a specific height/weight guess in the comment section. I will let the winner pick between a pillow OR boy/girl burp cloths similar to the ones I finally finished for Bennett. They are extra, super absorbent and fun!

I realize I have no pillow picture, but you know I will give you good schtuff…..so go and vote in the poll then give me your specific guess in the comments. Just a reminder. I was 7.13lb and 19 inches, Ryan was 9.2lb and 23 inches (dear God!) and Chloe was 7.14lb and 21 inches. Go, go go……

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A quick but very important shout out to my girl, Candace, for throwing me an intimate baby shower with my girlfriends last night. SOOOOO much fun and the food, oh the food. I wish I had my camera with me, it was sooooo good. Thank you so much Can, I felt so loved! I got some great things, but I have to do a special picture of the handmade items. My girlfriends are so talented, it kills me. Look at all the sweet things…notice that the bracelet and earrings are for me!

Okay, and now we will take a sentimental turn. Today my sister in law Brittany and I hung out with the Chloster on the porch for awhile basking in the 80 degree glorious day. Brittany took her out in the yard and was trying to show her how to blow dandilions, she didn’t quite get it as she licked more than actually blew any away. But it was such a cute, sweet time and it reminds me of the fact that my moments are rapidly closing in where it won’t just be me and Chlo any more. Although it is wonderful to have Bennett, my love and heart have been solely Chloe’s for 17 months. Bitter sweet. Enjoy some moment from our morning.