Beware…this is heavy.
When I moved to Lynchburg back in ‘94 to attend college I began looking for a church to call home. Within my first year I settled on what would be my church of now 13 years, Grace EV Free. To say I love my church would be an understatement. It has been my rock during a long hard 10 years of my life. A support to my marriage and children. I have some of the most amazing friends and mentors. I am forever grateful for my time here.
One of the best parts of my church is the worship. Our church has a full band along with lots of really unique instruments. Just full of talented artists and song writers. Most of our songs are unique to Grace and some are common worship songs and hymns.
There was one particular girl who went to our church in the mid to late 90’s. Her name is Ramey Reeves. She is one of those girls that is just effortlessly “cool”. She never tried hard but she just had that really amazing sense of style that was thrown together but worked. Didn’t wear any makeup or style her hair…and yet she looked amazing! She has an infectious smile and laugh. You just instantly liked her. I didn’t know her well, but I wish I did.
Ramey was on our worship team for many years. When she sang, she sang from her toes. You knew she didn’t give a flying flip what she looked like. If she wanted to lift her hands, she would. If she wanted to cry, she would. There was one particular song she used to sing a solo on that is one of my favorite songs. This song runs through my head all the time even 10 years later and I can hear Ramey’s voice in my head and all the little licks and runs she would put into the song to make it her own. I call it “Ramey’s Song”. I love her voice!
She moved away sometime around 1998, got married and had a little boy a few years later. It wasn’t until a couple months ago that I heard some devastating news that she had brain cancer and was about to undergo a second major brain surgery to remove a tumor. Instantly I signed up for her husband’s blog to follow the journey, praying with so many for a full recovery for her. The news was touch and go day to day. She struggled greatly to recover from her surgery having very little function or ability to communicate as well as losing sight in one eye. Still the prayer warriors marched on standing in the gap asking for a miracle.
Last night I was checking my bloglines and saw there was an update. As soon as I read the first line my heart sank so deep in my chest I actually gasped. Ramey had breathed her last breath yesterday and was home in heaven.
If you only have a few minutes, please, PLEASE read her husbands entry about her passing. I can only hope and pray to have that sort of grace and heart of worship if I were to lose Ryan. This entry also includes one of the most amazing things, a dream her seven year old son had last week. If you don’t cry after reading that, then I question whether or not you have a beating heart. God has a way of preparing us, even children to come to peace with his mysterious ways and timing.
As I crawled into bed last night no longer able to fight back tears. I looked across at my husband as he was talking and thinking this simple act of laying in bed with my husband talking about our day is no longer available to John and Ramey. I had gone up stairs to check on my children giving them one last kiss and thinking that moment is no longer available for Ramey’s son Judah. A wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend was gone.
I have not been exposed to much death. It is still a relatively abstract concept for me to deal with. I realized last night as I was grieving for Ramey’s loss it opened up the doors of my heart to a bigger concept. One as a parent you don’t want to dwell on. What if I were to die, what would happen to my children? We have a host of family and friends that would be there to support Ryan, Chloe and Bennett….but not to have their own mother…what would that be like? It is an unbearable thought to me.
This morning I have spent a good deal of time crying on and off asking God for some peace and clarity that I may come to terms with the finality of death and the glory of eternal life with him. One free of pain, tears, or evil. The selfish side of me doesn’t want to let go of anyone I love. I know it is because my mind can not imagine a world beyond what my senses experience right now. The riches of glory in heaven pale anything that this world has to offer. It isn’t that you can’t grieve the loss of someone and thank goodness her husband and son have the assurance that they will be reunited some day by the saving grace of Christ. I can not imagine not having that hope, how devastating.
I want you to enjoy two songs by Ramey. Listen to the lyrics, they will blow your mind given her circumstances and ultimate departure. I haven’t stopped listening and singing all morning. My heart stirs with so many emotions as I meditate on the words and picture this vivacious girl, the one with her hands held high singing boldly into the microphone now singing at the feet of Christ.
I don’t have many hero’s, but after reading this article and watching this video, learning more about her last few months and how she handled this devastating situation, I most certainly call Ramey Reeves my hero.
I am sorry she is gone. She sounds like she was a bright light in the world.
I hope that if I ever have to go like that, I go out with grace too.
Sorry honey. Sending love and hugs your way.
One song comes to my mind…
“This is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the day long…”
Beautiful post. Beautiful friend.
i don’t even know what to say. i didn’t know her, but i can see how beautiful she was. i’m balling. not sure when i’ll be able to stop. her situation definitely puts things into perspective for me…
Gaylyn told me yesterday and i can’t stop thinking about her. I read Johns entry and i’ve been listening to the songs. I can’t stop crying. i even posted a picture of her on my blog today. Thanks for posting this Kel. I hope to see her name everywhere in the next few days. Her story should be told. That article will rip your heart out and the video is amazing. That was our introduction to Ramey Reeves. Brian and i watched it b4 we left for France. I’m debating changing the spelling of my Ramy to Ramey so she will truly be “named after her”… Love you sweetie.
oh my word.
i am crying and i don’t even know her.
isn’t that what’s so awesome about being a Christian?
we can hear of a sister’s death and mourn her family and friends’ loss but REJOICE in knowing they will all see her again!!!
and i’ll meet her too.
i love that.
thanks for sharing this, kelly.
it IS heavy. it IS hard to swallow. but it IS the world we live in.
but the reality of Christ is what carries us through….
Hi there. I was one of Ramey’s roommates back at LU and we also lived in a house off campus in L-burg together. I also went to Grace EVFree while living there. Now I am back home in CA, but not a month went by when Ramey & I would chit-chat on the phone, talking about anything, laughing hysterically remembering our crazy times in college.
I had the opportunity to see Ramey one last time about a week after her 2nd surgery. She was still beautiful. The first time I walked in that NSICU room, I held her hand and spoke into her ear, “Rame… it’s me, Flo.” She immediately squeezed my hand as if to say, “Girl… it’s been too long.”
You and I have something in common: we had a friend name Ramey who’s life inspired us to live like her… obedient to our LORD, sharing the Gospel with boldness, and worshiping Him any way possible.
i read her husband’s entry and it was beautiful…what an amazing dream to be gifted to that little boy. i have never lost a spouse or parent, but i have lost a child and i know that God comes in a fills in gaps and spaces in overflowing abundance. He an awesome plan for them and i would love to see what it is.
So thankful to have found your blog today while browsing Delightful Blogs. This is a beautiful post and this lady left quite a legacy. Thanks for sharing.
Be glad in the Lord and rejoice you righteous ones…
That’s been in my head all day ever since I read this
Kelly, thank you so much for this post and for the links. I came across Ramey’s site through another friend a couple of weeks ago but it wasn’t til reading your blog that I felt compelled to read more. I think I really assumed (when I read it awhile ago) that she was going to live. I absolutely love when the article talks about when she & her husband met and he said “Any color would look good on you.” So precious. And then when I heard her son’s name was “judah” I gasped. I don’t know very many judah’s–I have a constant daily reminder to pray for her Judah. Anyway, it is so heavy. But life is heavy. I’m praying for you, girl.
I wouldn’t have understood your pain if it hadn’t happened to us last year at this time too…our friend lost her husband in a freak wind storm accident and she was left behind with 4 kids under 7yrs. I was so in shock that God would take someone who was so on fire for God, and desperately needed by his family. I too cried on and off for days and went over in my head, how hard it would be to miss out on all those little things (like chatting in bed) and sharing the joys our children give us, etc. It is so hard to comprehend. I am sorry for your loss and really won’t ever understand why this happens until that BIG picture is revealed to us in heaven when GOD will bless us all with his presence, comfort and JOY.
She seemed like such a spark of life. I love that she got a new style of hair to prepare for her surgery, Such spunk.
This came to mind: though I am not sure what said it…
We are not human beings having a spiritual experience we are spiritual beings having a human experience.
Thank you, Kelly, for posting this! I also posted about Ramey on my blog. Shayna, her sister, was my best friend growing up and her family was such a solid foundation for me. They were most definitely a part of my coming to know Jesus. Ramey will be missed and this is such a tribute to her amazing life!
I am sorry she had to leave this world so early. Your post is so nice and a those pictures of her are just so beautiful. I will for sure check out his blog. My thoughts and prayers are with everyone.
It is amazing how many lives she has touched. All the updates I have gotten about her have been from people who don’t know her, but find her and her faith amazing and are praying alongside her. Reading John’s entry was emotional for me as well, and I only hope I could accept that kind of diagnosis with the grace, peace, and faith that they did. It is exciting to think of all that God will do through her passing, even amidst such a painful time.
Beautiful post, Kelly. What a beautiful woman and a beautiful spirit. She’s “partying” with Jesus, now, praising the man himself.
Pat and I both cried when we read her husband’s entry about her death. What an amazing perspective after just losing the love of your life. She was obviously an awesome woman. Thank you for posting this. I didn’t know her, but just reading through the different entries on the blog, I admire her and her passion for life.
Wow…it’s all I can really say. I lost my mom to cancer when I was 11, and I have questioned God, and I have hated God, and I have loved God sometimes all at the same time. My dad had a similar dream to Judah’s only it was after my moms passing and it brought our family much peace. I have had dreams with my mom in it that have sometimes seemed so real that I used to walk through the house and look for her. (Especially right after it happened.) I hate that someone so young, vibrant, and devoted had to go so soon, but my mom was a lot like Ramey with her love for the Lord and for music. Sometimes I just tell myself that my mom reached the highest level of love and life that God wants for each of us, and she just reached it sooner than others. (It makes sense to me!)
Anyway, this is a beautiful post, and I read John’s posts as well, watched the video and cried through all of it. Thanks for sharing her beautiful life.
i just learned this morning that my friend had passed away and I was just trying to read online more about how it happened. Wow it has been a day of sadness for me. The wind was taken out of my sails when my friend just emailed me about it and I did not even know she was sick.
I just keep thinking about her spirit how infectious she was (great word) and how she just let Jesus shine through her. She and I were friends at LU and I went to church with her a few times. We had a bond and she just had a neatness about her. I always aspired to be a little more like Ramey especially when it came to my faith and how open she was about it. She is just one of a kind and one day I will be with her again in Heaven. Thanks for the lovely post. Heather Reichard Jenkins
Hello Kelly,
Thank you so much for the wonderful words you posted here about our mutual friend Ramey Reeves. I will miss her greatly. Thanks for sharing. Grace & Peace! Sean
I knew Ramey through one of my college roommates (Bonnie Curran). I always thought that she was so cool and I wanted to have that carefree spirit that she had. I admired her singing and was always in awe of her and her gift for music. From what I remember, she was always so positive and upbeat and it seems like she was that way till the end. I actually had just learned that she was sick only a few weeks ago and I’m so sadened by her passing. What a gift we have to know that one day we will see and hear her again.
that was a beautiful tribute…
I read this awhile back and still cry everytime I see it.
What a beautiful lady. Wow, that really brings tears to the eyes….I must say that I’ve needed to read a post like this. I found out yesterday that I need an MRI done of my kidney because something may be wrong. My blood pressure, out of the blue, is off the charts and I was put on 2 meds over the course of 2 days. I’m scared and I admit my attitude has left a lot to be desired….There’s a lot to be learned from a strong, Christian woman like Ramey. Thank you for this.