I don’t get it…what is the point of the one-ply toilet paper? I am lucky enough to have my own bathroom in my classroom. It is not used exclusively by me, but only a small select hiney’s grace the toilet seat. For the life of me I can not understand the ECONO roll of toilet paper they put in this tiny little C-shaped spot.Â
First of all….you can’t hardly spin the roll when it is first put on. You usually get those mutant scraps of toilet paper you don’t know if you should flush, throw away or chuck on the ground. ( I always wondered why there were small pieces of toilet paper on public restroom floors when I was a kid)
Second of all…you have to use a ton of toilet paper to even get a decent wipe. There is nothing worse then when the toilet paper soaks through and you know you are touching your own urine….NASTY! I won’t even go into the senarios that can happen on the back side. Not to mention…the paper is so ROUGH!!! How is that possible?
Third of all….what is the point? I for one use way less toilet paper when I have the 3ply sheets. There is a comfort in knowning there will be no leak throughs or cuts and abrasions from sandpaper toilet paper.
I know I am not mentioning anything that many of us haven’t already thought about or complained about…but it just struck me again as I took my 2nd period trip to the bathroom. I am so tempted to bring in my own toilet paper…but I know I would end up spending way too much money on something not that important.Â
My last rant of the day…..pantyhose. I am not a fan in the least. Thankfully Virginia permits about 9 months of pantyhose free weather. Those other 3 months are torturous to me. I already have ridiculously short legs so panty hose never line up where they are suppose to. I have to do this neat little trick where I pull all the extra material down past my toes and tuck it under my feet so I have the ball of pantyhose in my shoes. It is better than the alternative…granny knees and ankles. I would rather not draw attention to those two places on my body. Very few styles fit my body type and height. You suck Hanes! I am probably limiting myself because I refuse to pay over $4.00 for a pair of hose that could run the first time I wear them. I don’t consider hose and investment.
Anyway…in a gross attempt to put off the inevitable work that sits on my desk…that is my post for today. If you only knew how many times I spelled toilet wrong.. had to go back and switch the o and the i around…you would laugh. I am a horrible speller. If you ever want to feel good about yourself play Scrable with me. YIKES
That last line about spelling and Scrabble was a joke right? Anyone? Anyone?… I love you and your short granny knees.
“…but it just struck me again as I took my 2nd period trip to the bathroom.”
just reread that line over and over…
2 period trips huh? i don’t know much about that girl stuff but something tells me charmin doesn’t make a ply to combat the menstrual cycle.
Thank you for that vivid and disturbing trip into the bathroom with you. But it is nice to know that I’m not the only person disturbed by the thin-ply, close-encouters-with-your-own-fecal-matter tp scenario that plagues most public restrooms.
(but I do think bringing your own tp is a good idea - sense of familiarity and comfort in a place most like to feel it)
i hate those tire-sized rolls in those containers on the wall in the movie theater stalls (and various other establishments.) i had this issue just the other day… there was no starting point! i sat there for a good minute rollling and rolling trying to find it. i finally just ripped into it and made my own starting point.
if you did bring your own tp to school, do you think you could write it off as a business expense? you can write off school supplies you purchase… so i would think that should qualify.
oh my gosh! you are soo funny. You have me laughing out loud. I’ve told so many people about the way you tell a story. You just have such a way. I love it.
Dude! the TP.. my grandparents have this motor home and they use that stuff. It’s terrible. I guess it’s good for the pluming or whatever. I hate the soak thru’s tho! yuck!
pantyhose are the reason why i quit MK i couldn’t handle those bad boys! hate em’ totally with you.
see you friday! miss you..
“There is nothing worse then when the toilet paper soaks through and you know you are touching your own urine….NASTY!”
I could have gone my whole life without that kind of clarity.
Joe… Classic. I about spit on the screen and then kept laughing so much that I had to pause because I couldn’t concentrate enough to read other comments…
School toilet paper is straight out of the pit of hell. That’s what happens when you always go with the lowest bidder.
Okay guys…..2nd period means…..2nd period in the school day. There are 7 periods in the day. I do actually have a line I care not to cross and talking about menstral cycles flipantly would be one of them. Gutter boys!
ooooohh.. I thought the school was red becaus eof the seven periods a day. But I just found out that red is a standard color for brick, weird
I’ve heard enough already!!!!!!!
P. S.: Hey Joe, you need to work on your own blog so we can all have a shot at ripping YOU a new one.
I thought the whole “Scrable” thing was a joke, but Ryan just informed me that it wasn’t.
Wow.
You are such a hoot!! I loved your blog. I totally agree on both accounts.
OHMYGOSH - That picture of you is GORGEOUS! You are so beautiful. I officially hate you right now and feel super ugly (although I am wearing hot pink shoes so at least i’m fashionable). Can I get a copy of that to enlarge for a mural! No kidding, you’re beautiful.
Okay - i’ll lay off it now…it’s getting awkward…